Spontaneous Self Care

Massage, soaking in a warm bath, mani-pedis, yoga, a walk with girlfriends… I listened as all of these were brought into the conversation about self-care. But they all sounded like things to do on evenings and weekends, as if we can plan ahead when we’ll need self care the most.

Don’t get me wrong, I love all of these activities. But self-care is often something we need in the middle of the day, in the middle of a stressful task or project, before a presentation or after a difficult conversation. We can’t always schedule our needs (or our stressful moments, crises or emotional breakdowns) in advance.

So what might spontaneous self care look like? What practice can we turn to when we need it most? 

Here are just a few ideas to implement between meetings or tasks, when you can be off camera or sneak off to a focus room:

BREATHE. Our subconscious mind takes care of this for us; it’s automatic. But many of us do it poorly. Stop everything. Put a hand on your abdomen, below your belly button. Breathe in deeply, feeling your hand rise. Hold. Slowly exhale. Repeat three to five times.

STRETCH. Stand up, raise your arms over your head and yawn. Shake out your arms and shoulders, kick your legs, move your body. You’re not designed for this life in front of a desk and screen, so you need to step away from it several times a day, even if just for a minute.

FEEL. Get quiet. Notice what you’re feeling in your body and describe it to yourself:  Where do you feel it? Does it have a shape? A color? A sound? Is it vibrating? Fast or slow? …and so on. Call it by its name (anxiety, stress, grief, sadness) and it may begin to dissipate. 

HYDRATE. Few of us get the water we really need, especially as the weather grows colder and drier. Drink a glass or brew some tea. 

PRACTICE GRATITUDE. Rest your hands in your lap. Close your eyes. Think of something you’re grateful for. Feeling gratitude releases dopamine into your body, brings us into the present moment and gently pushes out any lower-register emotions.

What’s your spontaneous self care go-to?